It's breathtaking how many times I've had to smell this. The curiosity overwhelms me. So begins the search for my companions. After all, who investigates strange smells without company? Speaking of company...where is everybody? This nose of mine struggles to pinpoint the four-legged friends I've come to know over these past few months.
Something is off.
"Skipper," I think to myself. At least that's what the farmer calls me. "You know better than this to delay the inevitable."
I strain, nose and ears working in tandem to take in the faint...wait...yes. there it is. The distant sounds of howling. Distress....
"But I don't understand," said Marie, carefully patting her French-inspired doo. She had enough hairspray on it to make it impervious, not only to wind, but to the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune as well. "Why can't you explain this to me? What do you mean they've had enough cake?"
"Don't worry about it, Ms. Antoinette," said Katie Couric with a grin. "It's nothing to lose your head about."
*rimshot*
Leaving was the easiest decision to make, and the hardest action to take.
Clearly, it was better not to have to work for such a person. But on the other hand, if he left, he'd be leaving his co-workers to face her incompetence and maltemper himself.
What was he supposed to do? He had "Assistant Manager" on his resume now, it'd be easy for him to find other work. But over the past 6 months, he'd become good friends with a lot of his employees, who were all fun, smart people.
But, but he looked for another job. And he...
The following is excerpted from IrishAbroad circa 2000:
Flashback .Sunday morning 11am...Woke up to the sound of me oulwan bawlin up the stairs..."Will ye get bleedin up, and go and get me the News of the World outside the church for jaysus sake, out til all hours last night"....Me head was bleedin spinning...I could never handle those rock shandys. I was rackin me brains tryin to remember what happened with Suzie, Phil, and Mags, and for the life of me I couldn’t remember...The waft of Kearns` sausage’s wrapped in batch loaf smothered in lashings of grease was what greeted me...
Drip.
Drip.
Drip.
The droplets of drool fell like stones from the gaping monstrous mouth. Gusts of racid breathes portruded before it. Sckirrrrrrrrrrr. The earsplitting whistle of its call, feeling like nails were being dragged down a chalk board next to my ear.
More were coming. My fearful eyes could see the shadows dragging themselves along the ground.
Useless bloodied limbs, torn apart by the undergrowth hanging uselessly between their ferocious canines. Blood surrounded their snout.
They were coming. For me.
Running had always been an expression of freedom. That's how she had always seen it. The wind whipping through her hair, tugging at her clothes as her feet moved so fast that she felt like she was flying. AS though for just that moment, she was soaring above the ground, close enough to the clouds to touch them.
But then she began to notice the strings. The tiny threads, invisible against the light, that were attached to her clothes, hooked into her skin, threaded through to her soul.
When had that happen? When had she become the marionette? The freedom...
i jumped off the bridge and hit the water.
OK, so i didn't judge the height of the bridge or he depth of the water, but i jumped nonetheless. instead of the sudden death i had anticipated, i found myself floating on top of the water. the bridge was about 5 feet high, but the water underneath was only four and a half feet deep, as deep as a normal swimming pool.
well, i'm still alive, which is kind of ironic because i didn't intend to jump off the bridge in the first place. but my friends yelled at me,...
We take the ability to breathe for granted. It's the basic function that keeps us alive, you would have thought that we would keep a closer eye on it, that we would pay attention to how many lungfuls of air we consume every day. But we don't. We don't think about that mundane process because that is not the element of breathing that adds a spark to life; it is the thieves that trade in such banal fare that creates the interest.
For a breath once stolen is never forgotten. Whether it be by the view from a hill over...
We almost died on the way to Guayaquil. I think we would have been more worried if there hadn't been a near-accident. Back in San Juan, we showed off our dismissive gazes and new fedoras to anyone who condescended to notice. We are the hip. We are the elite. Our Che shirts are the only ironic Che shirts south of Belize. We are sexy Ecuadorean hipsters. Fear us.
She didn't look at him. She couldn't. "Look at me!" he shouted. She didn't. She couldn't.
She did.
Then she did again.
This went on for several hours.
"Stop looking at me!" he shouted. But she didn't not look at him. She couldn't not.
Then she didn't.
He was always looking at her. It was a condition called Iseezyaz, which causes the poor soul to stare at the person closest to them for all of infinite eternity. "It is perhaps the most unsettling, and boring disease known to mankind," Dr. Jesus Katmandu, discoverer of the disease had said upon the...